What Parents Need to Know. Does Your Child Have a Secret Instagram Account?

Instagram, a widely popular app, is known as a space where people share glimpses of their lives—and get a peek into others' lives, too. It's a favorite for celebrities and influencers looking to connect with fans and build a following. Recently, it has also become a key platform for brands and advertisers to reach their audiences.

There's a trend on Instagram that teens may not be sharing with their parents: the "Finsta," or Fake Instagram. Finsta accounts allow teens to post photos and videos just for a small, trusted circle, avoiding the parental supervision they may get on their main Instagram profile. For many teens aged 12-17, Finsta has become the place to share more uncensored moments with only their closest friends, without the concern of parents or other adults discovering it.

Private accounts, often set to "friends-only," frequently showcase aspects of teens' lives that they don't reveal on their public profiles. These accounts can share everything from funny moments to more personal experiences, including rebellious or risky behaviors like underage drinking and experimenting with substances.

Teens tend to express themselves more freely and they might use pseudonyms, making it challenging for parents or monitoring software to track these accounts.

How to Find Out if Your Child Has a Secret Instagram Account

If you're wondering whether your child might be having a Finsta, here are a few ways to find out:

Ask them directly. Give your child a chance to share openly and discuss why they feel they need a private account. This approach can lead to a constructive conversation about privacy and trust.
Check for multiple accounts. Instagram allows users to switch between accounts without logging out. To check, go to your child's Instagram profile and look at their username at the top. If you see a small arrow next to it, tapping this arrow will reveal any other accounts they're logged into.
Review their followers. Often, teens will follow their own Finsta account or be followed by it. Look through their followers list to see if there's an unusual account using an alias that might belong to them.

Not all secret Instagram accounts are cause for worry. For some teens, it's a safe space to share with close friends and be themselves away from the pressures of their public profile. But if the account shows a different side of your teen that raises red flags—like risk-taking or troubling behavior—it may be time to talk with them.

Remember, not even private accounts aren't entirely secure. Screenshots can easily be taken and shared, and private posts can quickly become public.

Is Instagram Safe for Children?

Instagram requires users to be at least 13 years old to create an account, though there's no verification process—kids can simply enter a false birth date. Instagram has begun using AI to detect underage accounts, and they provide a reporting form for suspected underage profiles.

In 2024, Instagram introduced "Teen Accounts," which apply default settings aimed at keeping younger users safer. These accounts include:

Private by Default: Only approved followers can see posts.
Messaging Controls: Limits messaging to friends and connections only.
Sensitive Content Filters: Reduces visibility of certain content, such as violence or cosmetic procedures.

Additionally, Instagram now has a Supervision feature that allows parents to set daily time and schedule daily breaks (e.g., before bedtime or during study time.

Instagram Risks Every Parent Should Know

Here's what parents should know about potential dangers:

Direct Messages from Strangers. While private messages on Instagram can only be seen by the sender and recipient, anyone can attempt to message your child, even if they aren't a follower.

Hashtags. Hashtags, which categorize posts by topic, can lead to inappropriate content even if the hashtag itself seems harmless. Any post that includes a hashtag is visible on its designated page, making it easy for kids to stumble across unsuitable material.

Inappropriate content. The search and explore features provide children with access to a wide range of content, some of which may be inappropriate. Additionally, teenagers can easily erase their search history, making it more difficult for parents to keep track of their online activity.

Cyberbullying. It can take many forms, from direct messages to hurtful comments on posts. Instagram's "Restrict" feature allows teens to hide comments from bullies without alerting them, but this doesn't prevent the teen from seeing the comments. Instagram has also introduced "comment warnings" to discourage negative behavior.

Negative impact on mental health. Instagram can be fun for expressing creativity and connecting with friends, but it also encourages constant comparisons to others. The pressure to "keep up" can lead to self-esteem issues, as teens may feel the need to match the often unrealistic lives of their peers and celebrities.

Unwanted exposure via Finsta. Even though teens may feel safer sharing personal posts on their "Finsta," remind them that privacy isn't guaranteed. Friends or followers on these accounts can easily take screenshots and share those images without the account owner's consent.

How to Set Up Parental Controls on Instagram

Ensure both your and your child's Instagram accounts are up-to-date.

From your account:

1. Tap your profile icon in the bottom right corner-> Go to Settings -> Select Family Center.

If you aren't connected with your child on Instagram, you can share a link to invite them to join supervision. They have 48 hours to accept before the invite expires.

2. Activate Supervision and:

Set limits on when and how they use Instagram
See who your teen is connected to and who they've blocked.
Manage their safety settings and approve their requests to make changes.

Note that:

You won't be able to see their private messages, posts, or search history unless their account is public.

Parents and teens can remove supervision anytime, and it automatically ends when they turn 18.

How to Make Instagram Safer for Kids

1. Set the Account to Private: Go to Profile > Settings > Privacy and toggle Private Account to restrict visibility to approved followers only.

2. Remove Unwanted Followers: From your child's profile, tap Followers and select Remove next to any unwanted follower to limit who sees their content.

3. Hide Offensive Comments: In Settings > Privacy > Hidden Words, enable Hide Comments to filter out offensive language automatically.

4. Unfollow Inappropriate Accounts: To unfollow someone discreetly, go to Following and tap Following again to remove them from your child's feed.

5. Turn Off Commenting for Specific Posts: Tap on the post, select the three dots in the top right, and choose Turn Off Commenting.

6. Delete Multiple Comments: Go to the post, tap on a comment, then choose Manage Comments (iOS) or press and hold on a comment (Android). You can delete up to 25 comments at once and even block or restrict multiple accounts if needed.

7. Use Story Controls to Manage Message Replies: In Settings > Privacy > Story, adjust Allow Message Replies to "People You Follow" or "Off" to reduce unwanted responses.

8. Block or Report Unwanted Interactions: If someone is being inappropriate, open their profile, tap the three dots, and choose Block or Report.

9. Report Content for Safety: If your child sees concerning content from friends, they can report it by tapping the three dots on the post, selecting It's Inappropriate, and choosing Self Injury.

10. Direct Messages Safety: Remind your child to avoid interacting with strangers. Direct messaging allows for sharing posts, locations, and hashtags, but you can monitor who they're connected with.

11. Disable or Delete the Account if Necessary: Instagram lets you temporarily disable or permanently delete accounts. Access this option if you feel it's best for your child's safety.

How to Protect Your Child on Instagram

If you allow your child to use Instagram, consider creating the account for them. Set the highest safety settings and use the account yourself initially before handing it over.

Ensure your teen is at least 13 years old before allowing them to use Instagram.
Have regular conversations about social media and privacy. Discuss updates or news about these platforms to help them make informed decisions.
Talk with your child about algorithmic influences. Help them regularly search for positive topics and avoid content that may negatively impact them.
Encourage your child to block or report inappropriate behavior. Using these tools helps protect not just them but others on the platform, too.
Stay connected by following your child and their friends on Instagram to keep informed of their online interactions.
Use Bitdefender Parental Control, which helps you filter out inappropriate content, set screen time limits, and monitor their activities for any red flags —all without intruding on their personal space. It's included in all Bitdefender paid security solutions; you only have to download it on your child's devices and use it.

FAQs

Should I allow my 12-year-old to have Instagram?

Instagram requires users to be at least 13 years old to create an account. This age limit is intended to protect younger users from inappropriate content and online risks. Even with privacy settings, Instagram may still expose children to mature topics and interactions with strangers.

How can parents see what their children do on Instagram?

Parents can monitor their children's activity on Instagram in several ways:

1. Supervision Tools: Instagram's Family Center allows parents to invite their teens to share their account activity. This helps parents see who their child follows and their overall engagement without accessing private messages or posts.

2. Follow Them: By following your child's account, you can gain insights into their interactions and interests, as long as their account settings don't restrict your access.

3. Device Monitoring: Use Bitdefender Parental Control to set limits on Instagram usage and keep track of screen time.

What is a Finsta?

A "Finsta" is a slang term for a "fake Instagram" account that many teens create as a secondary, private profile separate from their main, more public account. Finstas are typically shared only with close friends and used to post more personal or casual content that they may not want to share on their main profile. Unlike a main account, which might be curated to reflect a specific image, a Finsta often contains unfiltered, spontaneous, or humorous posts.

What should parents do if their teen has a secret Instagram account?

Start with a conversation to understand why they felt the need to create it. Teens often set up secondary accounts for privacy among close friends rather than risky behavior. Express any safety concerns you have, and discuss setting healthy boundaries for their online presence. Instead of forcing them to delete the account, consider setting privacy guidelines together.